New York Magazine’s Sex and Love Issue includes a read on the MILF phenomenon. And for once this exploration of the MILF movement (they said movement – not sure about that one) was a worthwhile read. It delivered beyond the usual review of hot moms and the jeans they love. (Yes, I know – I did say New York Magazine). Extra credit for stopping to acknowledge both the objectification issue (this is a problem) as well as the allure of making MILF and the status it (appears to) offer.

All of which leaves us a little conflicted about the movement. We, like many modern women, are trapped between two fears: that having kids will make us unsex, and that trying to stay sexy will make us ridiculous. Our inner feminist tells us that MILFdom is not a solution but rather a self-destructive form of female-chauvinist piggery, to borrow Ariel Levy’s term: Are today’s mothers really so afraid of seeming past their prime that they accept objectification as a compliment? In this light, the MILF mandate is just another superficial standard for women to try—and fail—to live up to, the final, exhausting step for alpha moms trying to “have it all.” First, there is the pressure to be alluring during pregnancy—to carry it off like Heidi Klum rather than getting puffy-faced like Kate Hudson. (Yeah, turns out it’s now okay to call a pregnant woman fat!) Then there’s the race to get back into shape everywhere (“Kegels! Kegels! Kegels!” order the moms on UrbanBaby). Next, the small matter of resurrecting your libido from the diaper pail. And finally, MILFhood. (Though anyone who saw Dame Helen Mirren at the Oscars might argue that it doesn’t even end there: Hello, GILF!)

And again, the issue – yes, this is about an attempt to hold on to aspects of pre-maternal life. And this is not, can not be limited to physical success (what does that mean anyway?). As I have said and heard over and over – “cute is the easy part” - and really being a MILF – aspiring to be a MILF is a journey down very shallow waters (with lots of rocks and other ways of quickly getting injured)….and I say this as a woman who is known for meeting the criteria (physically, I mean). Being a MILF is cute, one-dimensional – very few women I know aspire to cute. It is a one note song and frankly, boring as hell. And despite the the author’s attempt to elevate the MILF by suggesting new, more stringent criteria for making the club (in short you had to NOT have been a sleaze before or during your MILFdom, you know, been respectable)….I am going to still go with BORING.

Like most of my contemporaries I choose to focus on being a MILE – Mom I’d Like to Employ (see my February Blog index for the results of the MILE Awards). A MILE is, in short, a woman who strives to remain full, vital, alive and YES – she is sexy as can be. A woman is does not fear being past her prime because she finds herself more firmly rooted in her sense of self and her values with each passing day. A woman whose passion for her family and her work radiate from within, keeping her beautiful in a much more profound way – in an authentic “this is who I am now”, non-apologetic, and confident way. And yes – we MILES do go through many of the MILF motions (we workout, we shop, some of us own lots of bags, lip gloss and great shoes, we have a mani/pedi/blow-out thing happening) – we just do that AND then some (me for example -of course the work - and I read, I cook, I spend time with friends)…and not to have it all – rather to be ourselves. And that, as I have stated over and over is sexier than almost anything I can imagine.

As for Em & Lo’s attempt at tying the MILF phenomenon into a bi-product or a continuation of the “new pregnancy” – no I am not going to buy that. Cheep, easy arch (shot) that does tie this all together, for sure – but does not fly.

Well today started unlike any other day of recent memory (less my time in Europe) there was no “good morning buzz” of my blackberry at 6 30, just an eerie silence. It took me all of 3 minutes to realize we were in a dark place. Well it turns out (and thank you Matt Drudge peeps for always knowing what’s what) that there is a Blackberry Blackout….WHAT?

Floods, Armageddon black skies, a week without bread…this was not enough. Now we must endure a Blackberry Blackout. I am being tested! I feel this may well be biblical. Perhaps this is he beginning of the end. A sure but subtle sign that things are not as they were…I don’t really know what to make of this.

I have some theories – is it my In Style deadline? Is this a clever ruse to keep me writing and at my desk? Could it be that Jen has asked me (for close to a month) to commit to an AM here in the office to focus on some things that do require my attention? Have the Blackberry Gods conspired to keep me off the elliptical, mani-free, out of the coffee shop, away from the bank and just sit on my tush?

I don’t know – but it is working. I am here if you need me… VIA TELE OF COURSE.

When last we spoke I was headed for the Babble fete at 60 Thompson – I was able to meet up with Andy Newman and Teena first for a drink at The House (new fav nabe vino joint). And that was needed – because that party was a hipster zoo! Highlights included seeing some familiar faces such as Risa Goldberg (Big City Moms), Danielle and Josh Friedland (Celebrity Baby Blog and The Food Section) and Ellen and Michael Diamant (Skip Hop). Lowlights including missing people I really wanted to see such as Lambeth and Alison and Allison from Apple Seeds. The defining moment was realizing that my super sized bag really could save my life in crowded situations! Thanks for Ada and co for including us in the fun.

The rains came on Friday but it was such a great day to write (look for the new Baby By Design in In Style this June) and plan and just get the showroom looking super fab (new Bumble Bags people!) – all was OK! Some great calls too – April showers (ok MONSOONS) are not gong to get me down.

I got to spend some good time with Lit Agent Alex Smithline this weekend as well (no closer to a book, but me likes the way the boy thinks). We cased a few new joints and ended up again at The House.

And this came out this weekend as well – a fun piece by Julie Moran (no relation to Molly the intern) Alterio on Mom jewels featuring a few Julia quotes as well as our new object of admiration Heather Moore.

So soggy and blown all over town I may be – but I am still smiling!

The question the New York Times Styles section forces us to ask today is:

GRUP or GRAMP – who makes a better baby daddy?

Well, those of you who know me, obviously know I am going to vote “geez” – and once again, let us remember that the world is bigger than NY and LA and elsewhere this discussion becomes moot…so not too much time on this one kids…. Though I would love to know what you think…

I am going to take my sarcastic little tush to the Babble launch gig now…meeting up with Teena, Lambeth and other people who make me smile. Perhaps I will even de-snark! Seriously, I might!

This evening, Shawny and Yony (who have perfectly run every event I have ever pulled off!) – partners in The Sorelle group and I were the guest of one of my new favs – John Carns at Citronelle in the Latham Hotel in Georgetown. The joint was jumping, Michel Richard was in the house and the food was beyond! I did spy one woman reading and examining everything with a mini (and ridiculously bright) flashlight and sitting on a pillow (it was terribly distracting – ok maybe I am too easily distracted) but I have no real explanation for this. Anyway, while out to dinner and learning of LXR’s exciting plans for their two Washington, DC properities I got (about 25 emails) a Blackberry message from Stu Goffman who shared the news that Nestle was about to announce the purchase of Gerber from Novartis – supposedly to add a US infant food brand to their infant nutritionals (read as formula) heavy brand. From fancy French all the way down to baby food in seconds flat! You have got to be impressed!

As JPMA approaches and we ready for the final year what has been an important show to the entire industry, my mail box fills up with product pitches and invitations to visit booths and to experience (by appointment only) the latest in the world of pregnancy and baby. Usually I will wait until I have actually walked the show to nominate for my Wall Of Shame – you know, the new products that need not exist, waste consumers money, and the ones that promote fear, or worse the unrealistic notion of total control as even the most remote of a possibility in the process that is pregnancy and parenting. OK, so without any further ado allow me to share with you a little bit of the email I just received from BabyKicks (Count Kicks for Peace of Mind) –

kickTrak is a small, hand-held device, designed to assist expectant moms in keeping track of their baby’s movement patterns. Fetal movement is an excellent indicator of a baby’s well-being. In fact, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists highly recommends that pregnant women use kick counting to check on their baby’s health.

OK, you guys are so nominated…congratulations!

WWD did a great maternity market overview today. Bravado and their ever-strong and constantly-growing line of nursing wear scored some great ink and we are just thrilled! Love team Bravado. And on a related note, stay tuned as we are getting closer to unveiling latest and the greatest thing in nursing woman care and comfort – Bravado Nursing Lounges. Any idea where?

It is still so very (actually, more so) cold here in NYC. Yesterday I made my way around a very wet city but each stop was well worth the while.

*Breaskfast with Parent Play co-founder and writer extrodinaire, Lambeth Hochwald — always a great meeting of the minds! And thank you, thank you for the energy, enthusiasm and encouragement!

*A quick visit to Apple Seeds NYC…The new mecca for the junior set is finally open and looks fantastic. A and A are to be praised for building the just the right facility at the right time. The vibe feels as good as I have experienced and the aestehtic is perfection!

Well, the rains kept coming — I finally gave in and went to buy a heavier coat to get me through. I was lucky to find something at Paragon and so now a little warmer and a bit poorer, onward!

With Gina out with new baby Lucy, we knew we’d have to find some cover. And try as we might – good cover is just so hard to find! Our good luck continues, it seems, as our friend and industry compatriot, Teena Metternich (formerly of team Bugaboo’s New York office) has left the stroller tour de force in search of some time at home with her sweet baby Lila (another Lila!!!!). Well, you see where this is going – so I will cut to the chase – we are thrilled, really beyond elated that Teena has joined us at Forty Weeks. She is as cool as they come and knows this business as only one who has lived it can! She will cover for Gina and then we will somehow convince her to help us takeover the world! In the meantime, if you need to reach Teena - find her at the usual format (teena@fortyweeks.com)…

It is a cold (please, please tell me why it is still raw out and where the sun is for that matter?), busy and abbreviated Monday (it is Seder-time people, time to gather and recall the exodus from Egypt). And while I am busy as noted above– I am certainly not too busy to check in on my favs, not the least of which is Gawker. I clicked - and there it was – further proof positive that this explosive category in which we all live and work has moved well beyond the traditional confines in which we found it (you will recall that Forty Weeks was born in 1999 as a very hormonal and clear departure away from ducks and bunnies).

Our dear friends at baby style (now even dearer - and YAY for Emilia!!!) have bought some space on Gawker. Baby Style is advertising on Gawker. There is an adorable cherubic baby face gracing the pages of Gawker. I keep looking at it – it is very powerful evidence. And supports the Forty Weeks hypothesis….pregnancy and baby is an attention-worthy life-phase – with its own lifestyle and as such can live and breathe in/on vehicles not specific to the phase itself.

InStyle (that one is me, as you know) has led the charge with their special Baby by Design sections twice a year, New York Magazine shows us over and over again the power of the category each time they put their latest Pregnancy and Baby trend-find on the cover and certainly the New York Times does not tire of the topic. But Gawker, this is a whole ‘nother thing…and I am beaming, simply beaming (and feeling extra happy that it is April 2 and clearly this is not a joke!!!!!!!). I am going to also give some credit here to Ada and co at Babble who have helped to really move this bus along!