breastfeeding
Friday, February 25th, 2011
I have been in the business of pregnancy and baby for more than a dozen years. And yes, I have seen a great deal. Brands come and go, trends come and go, enemies du jour come and go – it is part and parcel of being smack in the middle of one of the most profound and powerful moments in a woman’s life. But what remains constant is the awe with which we accept the responsibility of bringing life into this planet (no matter what form that takes) – and the incredible feeling of connectivity (to other women as well as to the universe as a whole) a woman experiences as a mother. This bonds us to each other and makes friends of seamless strangers. This is what connects us despite the wide range of our life experience, age, expectation and certainly situation. We are mothers unified by our desire to “figure it out” the best we can as we make our way down a new, unchartered path.
So, it would seem natural then that the rise of Facebook would be a boon for women. Here was a vibrant open community on which we could collectively see, share and experience the remarkable and new (and often overwhelming) journey of pregnancy, birth and parenthood. Yet, somehow Facebook has decided this is neither the place nor the community for such endeavors. We have all watched as breastfeeding and birth have become high targets on the censor list. Ask Ciaran Blumenfeld about how we have managed to build a successful Facebook community for Bravado without so much as the use of the world “nipple” (forget a breast image) to keep us safe. And now, this week it seems pregnancy photography is an issue as well.
Too Much for FB?
I’ve asked some of the best brains in the business for their (very) quick take on the reality of Facebook and mothers. It was my goal to bring together a wide range of voices to help us make sense of this one. And so meet:
Audrey McClelland- Founder of Mom Generations, Co-Founder of Getting Gorgeous and other landmark projects connecting women. Mother of 4 active boys – . www.momgenerations.com
Sarah Evans -Social Media Expert – UNDERSTATEMENT. Sara is excited to be pregnant with her first child. www.sevansstrategy.com
Samantha Ettus – Bestselling author, media personality and personal branding expert. Author of Forbes Personal Branding Blog. Mother of three beautiful children. www.samanthaettus.com and www.expertsmedia.com
Danielle Friedland -
Danielle Friedland, mom of 2 breastfed babies. The Social Media Manager for giggle and Healthy Child Healthy World and Editor-in-Chief of Bravado Designs’ Breastfeeding Diaries blog. She created the Celebrity Baby Blog in 2004 which she sold to People.com in 2008. www.bravadodesigns.com
Nicole Feliciano- Founder and Editor of Momtrends.com. Super savvy and connected Mother of two equally stellar breastfed daughters. www.momtrends.com
Here is what this amazingly well informed and diverse group of Social Media leaders had to say on the question of why images of pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding – all central themes of motherhood, are such a challenge to Facebook.
Audrey McClelland - I have to admit, I was surprised to hear all of this was being censored by Facebook. Pregnancy, childbirth and motherhood is natural… and considering there are over 85 million moms on Facebook, it’s shocking to me that there isn’t a “safe” place to post certain things. I had always viewed Facebook as a place where women can come to connect, meet, share and engage… and I feel like this is stripping us from that. Truly. As modern moms, we look for ways to connect digitally because that’s the way people connect nowadays… it’s sad to see Facebook pull away such natural and open and honest images.
Sarah- I’m definitely new to this conversation, so what I’m sharing our preliminary thoughts…I don’t necessarily want to see my friends’ naked body parts on FB, but it is their decision to share.
Samantha - It is only this year that you could add your kids names and ages to your FB page in addition to your spouse. FB has been a late bloomer every step of the way in regard to parenting. In my mind it is a simple explanation – it was originally created for college kids by a college kid so it would be logical then, that the “grownup” categories are coming later, as the founders and the company age. Perhaps now that Randi Zuckerberg is married, a kid isn’t far behind and in turn, parenting will be a new focus. That is, if they get there before a competitor takes it on.
Danielle- Facbeook is not anti-woman — their staff is just not mature. I can’t confirm this but my impression is that Facebook is staffed by recent college graduates who don’t have pregnancy and motherhood in their mindset. They probably see a pregnant woman as fat instead of radiant. They probably see breastfeeding as “gross” instead of natural and nourishing. They have probably never seen a baby breastfeeding in real life nor were they raised thinking that breastfeeding is normal given that the majority of babies born within the last 20-40 years were not breastfed themselves. They just don’t get it. But you know who is? The COO of Facebook is Sheryl Sandberg, a woman who is also a mother. She needs to communicate to Facebook employees that pregnancy, breastfeeding and pride in motherhood is quite normal and in no way obscene. She needs to set policy that respects women and mothers as they are the largest growing population on Facebook.
Nicole- As for me, I find navel piercings more challenging than bumps and boobs. I’m sure this phenomenon is all about boys making decisions. Was social network (the movie) sexist? No, they just didn’t involve women that is different from being anti-woman.
The more companies we start the more conversations we steer.
And so with these insights comes more questions. And too, an opportunity to ask – what do you think?
Posted in Uncategorized, breastfeeding, marketing | 4 Comments »
Friday, October 22nd, 2010
I am lucky – I say it all the time. I have the great luxury of working on projects I feel passionately about and with clients who allow me to test the boundaries and push convention a bit (sometimes more!). I have been working tirelessly on one such project for a few years. Last November, my client Bravado Designs and I launched the Bravado Breastfeeeding Information Council.
Together, we set out to hear from real women. Bravado’s customers openly shared their experiences as breastfeeding women. We had 80,000 women who were eager to connect and communicate their personal stories good and bad. We had 18 years worth of experience to draw from. We asked and then we listened.
Next, we layered in the wisdom of a broad range of voices – Chris Pagula (Diaper Dude) shared with us the male point of view and helped us shape and make sense our important finding: The Man Behind the Milk. Lindsay Lebresco, who had personally advocated for, and then architected Graco’s nursing policies brought candid insights to our Pumping at Work Findings. Lisa Spiegel integrated her deep seeded understanding of the psychology of new mothers and couples, shedding amazing light on the topics at hand. Heather Kelly and Kimberly Seals Allerscontributed to our findings on First Generation Breastfeeders and finally, Bravado founder and IBCLC Sherry Leeder layered in her priceless wisdom on topics including breastfeeding in public. Our advisory board had a great deal to ante up – bringing an in depth understanding to the raw data and fueling the exchange. The launch of the BBIC was an important step in the process of gathering and sharing real time data on women’s experiences. And also in advancing the goal of openly communicating with all communities about nursing – without judgment but rather, encouraging acceptance, understanding and yes – support.
We shared our findings last year. You can watch the footage here.
The reaction to our inaugural event and research findings from those on-line, in the room and in all around us in the subsequent twelve months, has been not only powerful, but also breathtakingly candid and passionate. The buzz it has not quieted. The conversation continues and the data underscores for me the biggest lesson most base lesson of all:
Successful women have support
In work
In relationships
In play
In friendship
In all of our journeys, adventures and dreams – successful women have support
And yes (pay attention)
In breastfeeding
And it is not just a middle class mother that needs support– it is all mothers. At risk women, middle-class women, ALL women thrive though the support, care and nurturance of others.
Simple enough, YET…
I continue to read on and on about the WHO code as the issues– and how the many violators should be hunted down, drawn and quartered. And all I keep wondering – is why don’t we focus less on the WHO (violations) and more on HOME (opportunities)?
And so, not as any sort of activist but rather as one who simply loves, respects and personally stands for the advancement of women – let’s take on a new perspective and a slightly modified mission.
Let’s please commit ourselves to the women in our own communities. Whether they be our sister or a stranger cross town – let’s agree that this must be our promise and use our energy towards the opportunities closest to home. We will help and make a real difference where we truly can -closest to our home – in our families, or work-place our communities. Let’s grow confidence, skills and commitment to nursing in those that we know and love.
Today, Babble’s Heather Turgeon spoke of this critical concept as she explored why women quit breastfeeding. Kimberly Seals Allers did the same last week while considering the Michelle Obama’s remarks. I hope this is just the beginning of a new conversation…one that we will all have together.
Posted in breastfeeding | No Comments »
Monday, February 22nd, 2010
It has been a long day. I woke up and did the usual: kids, workout, latte (OH, I got my mayorship back at Quartermaine’s – a big deal, you know) repeat and then jumped on the 12 to be in NYC by 3 and am now on the 6 trying to get home before 9:30. Seriously, I did a round-trip to NYC today….and when I got there, a great intro to Bravado’s latest wonder — Bliss:
Introducing: Bliss by Bravado
That is stunning model Jessica (due in late March) wearing Bravado’s latest introduction, Bliss in Ivory. It is an amazingly comfortable, sleek and super chic innovation – the perfect addition to the Bravado family. Look for it in March, up to size 40 F/G (in black and Chai too). The seamless molded foam cups, feminine embellishments and flexi-fit ™ technology make it my vote for product of the year.
Plus I’ll throw in a nomination for Jessica as most adorable expectant mother (ok, next to Jenni Hogan) too – what a beautiful woman – inside and out. Good luck with your new daughter and keep us posted! As for the bra — March is just a few days away — keep an eye out for more news…
Posted in Uncategorized, breastfeeding, maternity fashion | No Comments »
Monday, December 14th, 2009
I adore the new Bravado Essential Nursing Tank in plum. Who can argue with seriously saturated color on the most comfortable nursing tank on earth? If I were a headless pregnant mannequin, this is what I would look like wearing it:
OOOOH, the hard-to find Plum is here!
Posted in Forty Weeks Style, breastfeeding | 1 Comment »
Thursday, November 12th, 2009
Jodi Hilton for The New York Times
This story is not new. In fact the only thing new and wonderful about it is the image – I simply adore the image of this couple breastfeeding at home – and I can think of about three better stories to go with it. This is an old story, leaving me to wonder –
Are we really having this conversation again? I am quite sure I did an interview for NPR and later GMA on this topic – oh you know – the new mother-slim down myth about 4 years ago. The one where we confuse and deflate new mothers by swapping out their job as a new mother (which absolutely includes feeding her baby and yes breastfeeding is the absolute goal) with that of a woman who uses her body and physical attributes to make a living (and by that I mean you Rebecca Romijn –actress who has a fleet of people helping you to lose weight WHILE you breastfeed). When interviewed years ago for GMA my quote was about looking in the mirror and seeing and accepting a newly born mother, beautiful as she was rather than looking in the mirror and seeing the pounds and subsequent shame. But wait, now there is more – now we will layer in breastfeeding and garble up the issue and confuse women some more. So in the spirit of my mood while reading Cathrine St. Louis’ piece from today’s New York Times, I will simply say: NO NO NO – not okay.
I love breastfeeding. I support breastfeeding; I am educated, articulate and active in my support of women and their individual successes as a mother. I have spent so much time and energy on the topic – surrounded by intelligent, concerned and certianly connected women and organizations who consider the care and feeding of new mothers to be a near calling. One of my proudest accomplishments is the recent establishment of the Bravado Breastfeeding Information Council with my client Bravado Designs. We have brought our years of passion, commitment, and connection together in an effort to raise the level of dialog to a place where women are not given mixed or harsh messages in the media around this important topic. What we have set out to do is empower women and I don’t see that articles like this do anything of the sort. This is not kind, nor is it respectful, nor does it help to simply a complicated time in a woman’s life. Most of all it does not focus on the real issues at hand.
Tuesday I helped to launch the BBIC – the plan, the goal the intention is to help the media cover the category of breastfeeding in a responsible, non-judgmental and informed manner. Please watch the whole of it here. And as evidenced by the New York Times today (yeah, ok it has only been two days) we have far to go…
Posted in Uncategorized, breastfeeding, celebrity, marketing | No Comments »
Friday, November 6th, 2009
I have been thinking a lot about retail lately – that and breastfeeding. The former because it a life-long interest/passion (I know I am an odd one) and the later because I am working on one of the most exciting projects of my career with my longtime client Bravado Designs.
Obviously Bravado retails (and wholesales) bras – but that is not the retail I am thinking about. I have been watching retail spaces empty out – and worse, watching designer collections shrink and even begin to diminish in quality, creativity and risk-taking. Both feel quite sad to me. And there is no doubt that the recession has not done its worst yet. Actually, last season retail sales like Saks’ 50% off already half off prices (oh did we score on that one – have I told you about Bob’s amazing new coat?) have led buyers to bring in less inventory. Likely sales will happen earlier (like this weekend at Saks – 40% ) to move existing inventory before that much money is left on the table again and we won’t see mega savings like last year again in 2010 – but I digress.
I’ve traveled a lot this week and for some reason, have retail spaces on my mind. I am thinking about pop up retail (I adore this concept, always have – it is such a buzz worthy proposition no matter which way you slice it) and reading up on the the latest on the trend in Time Magazine.
I am reminded of the empty storefronts and how ten+ years ago I filled them with art installations in downtown DC as part of a joint initiative between CuDC and Douglas Jemal Thinking about how forward-thinking (and yeah not always fair to the artists, but ok) his vision was and how the art invigorated the then up and coming corridors of Penn Quarter and later spaces through out the city. Thinking that model was a good one…Doug Jemal made good use of empty space and it worked, quite well.
And so here is where I am, considering the fate of commercial real estate- – (free standing retail, malls, etc. ), and thinking about breastfeeding and all I know about new mothers (which is a decent amount). Dare I to say that few people are thinking these two thoughts together all that often. And so in an instant - I am clear and quite certain that pop-up nursing lounges make sense – they are an elegant solution - fill empty spaces with the amenities to attract and super-serve customers. Make customers absolutely certain that they are wanted and appreciated. Create buzz, excitement and community. Pop-up nursing lounges are a glaringly obvious strategy for making lemonade (really good, all natural lemonade). Nursing mothers overwhelmingly (85% according to recent BBIC data) seek out retail and restaurants that are welcoming. Well that is easy enough to build (and easy enough to remove when the climate changes). In the meantime, we are looking at pure gain – all around. Businesses show their breastfeeding friendliness and open the door to a powerful and loyal market segment. Literally breasts mean business. And pop-up nursing concepts are a low cost, low risk way to invite in new mothers (and their dollars) to brighten up dark, empty retail shells and welcome new life (literally, again) into otherwise dead space.
So ok – you Mr. or Ms. super retail developer – you see it don’t you? But, you may not see exactly how to get from this brilliant plan of mine to some place of tactical excellence and glory – but I do. Seriously, I ‘ve got it all right in my little head (and contacts file). So let’s talk….
PS – steal this idea and I will come with my friends and make you hurt.
Posted in Uncategorized, breastfeeding, marketing | No Comments »
Thursday, October 22nd, 2009
The thing with ideas is many die on the vine. The post strategy session visual is that of an old-school janitor sweeping up little pieces of my brain from a client’s conference room floor, into the dustpan and then my glorious ideas meet their untimely death in the trash. Good ideas get thrown away all the time…
And that is what makes today even more special. Today my client Bravado is launching an initiative that was hatched in one of those amazingly exciting and prolific strategy sessions many moons ago in their Toronto headquarters. (As a side, but important note, Bravado’s conference room is an amazing Mecca for breastfeeding power and love – the walls are covered my the most stunning images of breasts – someday, I really, really want to get Fox News in there– I am sure the sight of all of those nipples and babies alone would make Glen Beck well up in tears, but I digress).
Today the Bravado Breastfeeding Information Council launches. It is the first of its kind, and I could not be more proud. We have advanced the conversation and grown a manufacturer into an information source. We have harnessed the voices of 80,000 women, the experience of 17+ years and acted on our deeply seeded motivation and desire to help elevate the qulaity breastfeeding coverage by making it easy to get the story right!
Our Mission:
The BBICserves as a resource to the media and influencers that both authoritatively communicate to and influence women, to provide accurate and non-judgmental information, statistics, trends and analysis on a regular basis. This information will serve to educate the public at large and support a positive breastfeeding experience for women in North America.
The BBIC is: Connected, Credible and Committed.
What is next? The BBIC will launch with an exclusive event on November 10. Kathryn From and Shery Ledder will share our new (and very surprising) research findings complete with analysis from our board including:
Lindsay Lebresco, Chris Pegula, Lisa Spiegel, Kimberly Seals Allers and Heather Kelley
You can join us! Actually, do join us – there is great swag for all (even virtual attendees), an opportunity to tweet in your questions and of course you can be a part of history! Register here and see you on November 10 at 12:30!
Posted in Uncategorized, breastfeeding, marketing | No Comments »
Wednesday, September 30th, 2009
This post is not about breastfeeding or formula. And while I am absolutely qualified to talk about Nestle I will not. I have been in the breastfeeding space for more than a decade. And the long, dirty history of Nestle’s marketing practices, WHO violations and human-rights abuses are simply a factual prologue to the recent stir that the Nestle family blogger event has caused in the social media world.
There is enough Nestle talk out there. I choose not to recount the history or educate anyone. The facts are in the public domain and easy enough for anyone to access. Since yesterday’s powerful and well-written post by Annie @PHDinParenting the lines have been drawn and it is getting nasty. I have watched from the sidelines (OK I have not been totally silent) – we are all witnessing mommy bloggers out for blood and people are getting hurt.
To me this is a case study for poor planning, short-sighted thinking and other classic marketing errors. What is clear to me is that there was no strategic or top-level thinking applied to this horrific play for Moms on the part of Nestle. In fact, it smacks of lack of experience, lack of understanding and certainly lack of expertise. Nestle has undervalued women in the worst way. Can’t you just imagine the “big idea” meeting: so the idea is they will love us, ask no questions and go forth and re-build our image all for the low, low price of a hotel room, some meals and some swag.
So Nestle, as a woman who is always curious and is passionate about marketing to new mothers – I am dying to know — who the hell was in that room? Who sat around the big old Nestle table when you failed to consider the terms of engagement with these women you wanted to woo? Or when you decided to withhold key information from women on the off chance that they would not find out? The plan was what — these moms should be your advocate and not know of your true, controversial history? How about when they were left in a position to defend you against the endless attacks on twitter and on blogs – how were they to manage that Nestle, what was the plan?
In fact, what Nestle has done is continued their tradition interpreting/massaging facts to suit their objectives. Never mind who gets hurt in the way, right? There is no statute of limitations on the many blemishes on your corporate resume and now you have added a new abuse, abuse of women (and some men too from what I understand)– congratulations on that.
This is a stunning example of why those who are involved with marketing to/with women and in specific, social media need to have well grounded leader managing their strategy. Someone with experience needs to be in charge and minding the big picture. Without going into a high level of detail here (boring, for some) strategy is built from a clear and well – thought out assessment and analysis of a brand’s strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats. Simple – marketing 101 stuff. Gunning to fast tactics cannot, will not advance a brand. In fact, ill-conceived programs such as Nestle Family have the makings of a perfect storm. And today has been just that…
Nestle has lost control of the conversation – in fact the conversation that is being had is not only off-message (one would assume ) but the defense of Nestle has been left in the hands of those least qualified to handle it — the bloggers who answered their call and came for a few days of fun. This is damaging to the brand on a profound level (obviously) and leaves these bloggers in an untenable position. Feeling loyal, under attack, not knowing facts, frankly over their heads and outside of any normal scope of engagement for an event like this.
So Nestle – one more question(as one known for asking so many probing, hard questions of my clients) – Now you have a war with your name on it – now what’s the plan?
Posted in Wall of Shame, breastfeeding, marketing, mommy wars | 10 Comments »
Wednesday, May 6th, 2009
For those of you who know me, who follow along and who “get” the Forty Weeks philosophy you know our credo is pretty straight forward. We focus on women and the Forty Week journey that leads to motherhood. We work with like-minded companies who offer products and services that are both needed and necessary. We focus on keeping products and services in the market-place that support and even enliven the journey. We care for all women – by providing care, adoration, respect, non-judgement and true consideration. We like to laugh too - it feels essential to the journey. And mainly we seek to protect women from those who would hurt us. We take this all quite seriously – that is who we are!
But what happens when women hurt women- when we hurt ourselves? When the pressure and the standards we set fail us and lead us to war with each other and ourselves. You know these wars of course because the media loves them so and covers them tirelesly and repeatedly. And so in all possible forums and with great frequency the Mommy Wars are front and center. They show up around almost every corner and they seem to be without end. But what is this really? In short, it is women hurting each other — and going to battle over very personal choices. Nothing new…nothing good.
But today I saw this on Momlogic and it was something new – a new level of wrong, of shame and of tragedy. I felt cold and sick reading the original article in the Mail describing how a new mother jumped to her death over her inability to breastfeed her baby. Yes – A woman killed herself because she could not breastfeed her baby well enough and considered herself a failure. The pressure was so great and overwhelming – her sense of personal failure so high and of course, of course her post-natal depression so extreme that it all slipped away. I am not taking away from any of these facts - all of these very real factors were at play. Yet somewhere she got the message (that then went through the lens of her post-natal depression) that her failure to breastfeed was a big enough failure to end her life over. She left behind a mother-less infant and a widower and a great void where she one stood. She died over breastfeeding. How did we get here and what have we done?
There is little to say and really all we can do is take a good hard look at ourselves. Who are we helping (and who are we hurting) with our positions. Is it worth a life? Is the Mommy War worth dying for.
I think not.
Posted in breastfeeding, mommy wars | No Comments »